420 ftw
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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