I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
