we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
