Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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