butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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