I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
