): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
