ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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