dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
