so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
