Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize