Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
