By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
