My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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