What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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