If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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