he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
