its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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