Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize