Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
