i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
