He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I have fence marks all over my body
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
