i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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