And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I am mentally ready for anal.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize