If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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