The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
