Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
