Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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