I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
