What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
