What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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