OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
