If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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