There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
