just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
