Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
