You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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