It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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