Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
