You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
