You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
