Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
