pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The uberlube is also flammable
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
