i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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