Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
My ass is underappreciated
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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