What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
