they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
