it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
