He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
