I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
