The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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